Friday, February 20, 2009

Bloodsucking Hilarity

Hooray! I found another of Pratchett's Granny Weatherwax stories (no thanks to you readers, who didn't share that information with me). Well, no hard feelings. Carpe Jugulum is a funny spoof of vampires, who are accidentally invited to a royal christening and decide to take over the kingdom with their "modern" ideas of vampirism. It's all very silly and clever, with a kooky Igor, a nerdy priest, and vampires running through castles craving tea instead of blood (how I love British humor). However, as a new mom, I especially enjoyed the following passage in which new mother Magrat packs up the baby's things for an emergency outing:

"When she looked up her face was set with purpose. She pointed at Oats.

'You find a bag or something and empty into it all the stuff in the top drawer over there, and take the potty, and the little truck, oh, and the stuffed animals, and the bag of nappies, and the bag for used nappies, and the bath, and the bag with the towels, and the box of toys, and the wind-up things, and the musical box, and the bag with the little suits, oh, and the woolly hat, and you, Agnes, find something we can make into a sling....'

There was a clatter from the direction of Mightily Oats. He already had both arms full, and a large stuffed rabbit in his teeth.

'Do we need all of that?" said Agnes.

'You never know,' said Magrat.

'Even the box of toys?'

'[Her father] thinks she might be an early developer,' said Magrat.

'She's only a couple of weeks old!'

'Yes, but stimulus at an early age is vital to the development of the growing brain,' said Magrat, laying baby Esme on the table and shuffling her into a romper suit. 'Also, we have to get on top of her hand-eye coordination as soon as possible. It's no good just letting things slide. Oh yes...If you can bring the little slide, too. And the yellow rubber duck. And the sponge in the shape of a teddy bear. And the teddy bear in the shape of a sponge.'"

1 comment:

Jenny said...

I'm all for bloodsucking, but I HAD to comment on Ben's sweet face. What a CUTIE! I just wish I could kiss that sweet baby. So cute...